I had all these plans this weekend of being sociable and having fun with my friends. I was supposed to go to two separate cook-outs to enjoy the beautiful weather while eating hamburgers and hot dogs, drinking beer, and joking, chatting, and just generally hanging out with friends.
So, did I do all that? No.
Did I do any of that? No.
My brother's birthday was last Thursday (May 22), and the anniversary of his death is next Monday (June 2). I haven't been thinking about him all the time, I just ... I'm just having a hard time getting my butt up and doing stuff, not to mention just plain getting out of the house. An old friend of ours has a son who is in critical care right now, and maybe that is bringing it all back a bit. Or just that it's Memorial Day weekend, and I'm memorializing. I don't know. It's just hitting me hard this year.
Or maybe I'm a little depressed or something. (Ya think???)
I've been thinking how I'm going to apologize to my two friends who had cook-outs, not only for not going, but for not letting them know I wouldn't be there. I'm sure I missed seeing a lot of people I know and love, but...
I think I just needed some "me" time.
I've spent most of the time playing Candy Crush or reading Facebook or watching bad movies on TV -- really important activities -- but I am scheduled to go the baseball game tomorrow with my sister, so I will get out of the house! I cooked yesterday (burgers), and will do laundry at some point tonight probably. I did change the sheets on the bed. I can do the groceries tomorrow before the game. And luckily, I have Tuesday off as well, so I can catch up on things then if I have to. Of course, the grand plan of cleaning and organizing has basically gone out the window. I kinda did one bit of each part of the plan and then got distracted and went back to nothingness. Maybe I'll do it all on Tuesday.
Or next weekend.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh yeah... I'm good at procrastination...